I had written in an earlier post about how our life should ideally be a mixture of happiness- where we want things(food, chocolate, love) and get them, and purpose- where we commit to doing something meaningful and achieve it over a period of time (scoring good marks, getting a good job, having a family etc.). The first kind of happiness alone is not sufficient for a person to be happy in the long run, since it lacks meaning by itself- this probably has some relationship with Maslow's hierarchy as well, where you get your basic wants and needs satisfied, and then you need to discover self-actualisation to be truly happy.
Another way to look at happiness and purpose is on the basis of who you are, and what you identify yourself as. For most of my life, I've tried to act like the normal human being when it comes to interacting in social settings, but over time I've realised that it's more fun to just be yourself. You get a lot of happiness by doing the things that define you- the things that you really like doing. As a relatively introverted kind of guy, I might prefer to stay home on a saturday night and play an RPG or watch a movie instead of going out and over time I've realised that it is OK to do this since this is the kind of guy I am and that I don't have to necessarily go out with people for the sake of going out.
Over the course of some more time however, I've come to realise that people who combine different types of characters- especially the strengths, tend to be much more succesful than people who stick to one or few traits. For example, a guy who is naturally soft hearted by nature and who is sensitive to other people- if he puts in a big effort and manages to do all the fun things and just be the normal guy in a crowd, can be incredibly powerful as a leader in social settings, as well as in the corporate world. Similarly, a girl who is talkative and fun and outgoing by nature- if she puts in a big effort to understand the softer and quieter side of life can have a huge impact on her surroundings and be much more succesful than otherwise and indeed more succesful than independently quiet/talkative people. I'm not suggesting that these are the only two types of people- whatever type of person you are, if you can embrace what you're not comfortable with- then you can indeed become a very well rounded character who has a huge impact around his surroundings (and become a character everyone can relate to), at the workplace or at home.
And now to relate happiness and purpose to self-identity. Being yourself and doing the things that you love doing brings you happiness. If you're a foodie by nature, indulge in a feast once a while to stay happy. This is essential to everyone to stay normal- to embrance one's true love(s). However, if you can also embrace the opposite- being health conscious and working out at the same time, then you bring in purpose as well. Similarly, if you're a kind person who teaches at an NGO orphans during Friday night, it would be excellent if you could go out on a saturday night to pub with your friends. Happiness and purpose- Being yourself, and being what you're scared of.
PS: When I say embrace what you're afraid of I'm only talking about good things- if you're afraid to physically injure a person, please don't for instance :P
Another way to look at happiness and purpose is on the basis of who you are, and what you identify yourself as. For most of my life, I've tried to act like the normal human being when it comes to interacting in social settings, but over time I've realised that it's more fun to just be yourself. You get a lot of happiness by doing the things that define you- the things that you really like doing. As a relatively introverted kind of guy, I might prefer to stay home on a saturday night and play an RPG or watch a movie instead of going out and over time I've realised that it is OK to do this since this is the kind of guy I am and that I don't have to necessarily go out with people for the sake of going out.
Over the course of some more time however, I've come to realise that people who combine different types of characters- especially the strengths, tend to be much more succesful than people who stick to one or few traits. For example, a guy who is naturally soft hearted by nature and who is sensitive to other people- if he puts in a big effort and manages to do all the fun things and just be the normal guy in a crowd, can be incredibly powerful as a leader in social settings, as well as in the corporate world. Similarly, a girl who is talkative and fun and outgoing by nature- if she puts in a big effort to understand the softer and quieter side of life can have a huge impact on her surroundings and be much more succesful than otherwise and indeed more succesful than independently quiet/talkative people. I'm not suggesting that these are the only two types of people- whatever type of person you are, if you can embrace what you're not comfortable with- then you can indeed become a very well rounded character who has a huge impact around his surroundings (and become a character everyone can relate to), at the workplace or at home.
And now to relate happiness and purpose to self-identity. Being yourself and doing the things that you love doing brings you happiness. If you're a foodie by nature, indulge in a feast once a while to stay happy. This is essential to everyone to stay normal- to embrance one's true love(s). However, if you can also embrace the opposite- being health conscious and working out at the same time, then you bring in purpose as well. Similarly, if you're a kind person who teaches at an NGO orphans during Friday night, it would be excellent if you could go out on a saturday night to pub with your friends. Happiness and purpose- Being yourself, and being what you're scared of.
PS: When I say embrace what you're afraid of I'm only talking about good things- if you're afraid to physically injure a person, please don't for instance :P
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